IDork

So I had just flown back from one of my first business meetings with my new comnpany. It was very exciting, but very…angst-inspiring? Nervousy? Whatever. So I was going to get back around 5:30pm, and I knew the iphone was being released at 6:00pm. So I figured I would just get one online, or saturday, or something. I dunno. But I got home pretty quick, and the launch was just then happening, and I was reading good ole' Engadget. And the editor there was #115ish or something in line, and got his within 20 minutes or so. I did some math in my head and figured, hey, why not!? And I went.

I got into the portable barrier arrangement, and worked my way towards the front of the store. Store employees were waiting out front applauding those who snagged them. I longed to be one of those people.

No more than 15 or maybe even 10 minutes later, I was in! More store employees pointed me to the register if you were "ready to buy." Of course I was. I've been ready to buy for a few months now. I got in, and went straight to a register(?!) I got out, iPhone in hand.

Now I had promised a relative staying at my father's house I woulkd visit, so that would be my next destination. Waiting a few hours to play with my new toy? Not a probllem, I'd been waiting months already and torturing those around me by telling them about it. But I realezed, as I was walking down 59th st., that I was going to look rather…conspicuous. You see, my father's house isn't in a really good neighborhood, and the iphone "bag" (a box with strings really) kinda…sticks out. I was in a panic. Someone will steal my iphone!!

Luckily, I spot a Duane Reade bag. I threw the bag in the DR bag – now it looks like I'm carrying a box of videotapes. The bag is unclean and worn, and I spotted it only 10 or 20 feet from a homeless guy but…my investment must be protected.

Now I'm on my way back home. I can't wait. I will return with more details. Hopefully, this will be my last post from my Blackberry.

Sent via BlackBerry from T-Mobile

New Job!

Well ladies and gents, I’ve had a great time and learned alot and done alot at Volchok Consulting, but I got a great offer to work at another company called Affinity Solutions, so I took it. I start on Monday the 14th.

It’s a step down in title – from CTO to VP – but the work looks good, the team seems great, the technology and solutions in place seem interesting, and I’ll be working for a great guy – their CTO, Mike Biamonte.

I’m expecting I’ll bump my head a couple of times into the “I don’t actually run this whole place…” problem a few times, but I’ve worked there before and I respect MB very highly, so I think it’s going to work out great.

I’ve been in the same place for a long time, and I really haven’t had much of an opportunity to really flex my metaphorical muscles. I think I will get to do that at Affinity. It’s an exciting time, and a little bit scary, but I can’t wait to get started.

I of course won’t be completely abandoning the guys at Volchok – I’ve been there a while, and I consider many of my fellow employees as good friends. And of course, there’s Total Annihilation, which I don’t intend to give up.

So I’ll be even busier than usual for a while, but I hope to be able to squeeze in some time to write something in here at some point. We’ll see.

Dive into Mark. Ruby on Rails.

I enjoy reading Dive into Mark. It’s a good blog.

Sometimes I agree with him. Sometimes I agree wit him, but disagree with how he says something. And sometimes, not only do I disagree with something he’s said but I disagree with how he’s said it.

This is one of the latter times.

The level of ad Hominem attacks in the article is off the scale.

Let me distill it down for you. Ruby focuses on ease of development. It does not focus on performance. They’re talking about a site there that has gotten itself to 11,000 requests per second. That’s a lot. That’s a fucking lot. And if you have that, you’re going to be doing some tuning and tweaking and who knows what. I know this from experience. But some dipshit started whining that it was Rails’ fault. Well, maybe it is, maybe it isn’t. I don’t think there’s any kind of web development framework that exists today that you can scale up to that level and not notice some kind of performance degradation. Hell, even if it’s in your own code. I have scaled applications up factors of a hundred times on some of the highest-performing web application servers in existence, and hell yes it strained my database, and hell yes I had to optimize stuff all over the place.

These web-dev guys wouldn’t even have a site were it not for Rails – they’d still be pounding on whatever other language they were working in. Then they certainly wouldn’t have these scaling problems, because they wouldn’t fucking exist! The developer doing the whining isn’t actually whining that hard – he’s talking about what is going on with him, and DHH, if he were smarter, would’ve shut the fuck up. But he didn’t. I mean, seriously, you’re the largest fucking Rails site on the web, and you have scaling problems? OF FUCKING COURSE!!! You’re the largest $BLAH site on the web, you do anything performey, and you will probably be dealing with performance issues. For any value of $BLAH.

It’s all so stupid. Webdude guy answered questions he was asked, DHH stupidly did some kind of counter-spin, and Mark, even more stupidly, is doing counter-counter spin because he’s a Python weenie.

You’re all morons. Die.

Thank you, and have a nice day.

2 year late God of War review

So I saw ads for God of War 2, and read various bits online about it, and found myself in posession of a Best Buy giftcard (Birthday! Nice!) So, I figured, might as well pick up GoW 1, which was available on the ‘greatest hits’ PS2 label, so it was only $20 off my card.

It’s extremely violent, and even has naked ladies in it. Well, topless ones. But as I’m playing through it I start to realize – this is one of the best-produced games ever. It has polish. Every time they violate one of the rules, they end up doing something right before or right after to make it okay. There’s a big nasty trap that you only know about by springing it and immediately dying? That’s okay, they checkpoint’ed you just before. You have to walk or do a jumpey-jumpey routine somewhere and fell and died? No prob, checkpoint! And just the level design and character design and the way they made almost everything interesting, even as you’re killing the same damned type of creature for the 50th time.

I won’t spoil too much of the story – but it’s interesting, and we learn more about our Protagonist/anti-hero Kratos as the story progresses. It keeps you interested for sure, and there’s lots of stuff going on. It’s surprisingly puzzley, but I suppose it would have to be or you’d just be pounding away at creatures all day.

Unfortunately, the polish starts to appear thinner and thinner as you get further along in the game. It’s almost as if you can see the ‘seam’ where one QA team finished and another took over. Cameras start getting in the way. You start running into problems where you have to do some long, lame routine of stuff and if you die at the end you haven’t been checkpointed, and have to do it again. Or you find you’re dodging the same two monsters for 15 minutes because you can’t find any health anywhere. As you get to the end, the cameras get hilariously bad – I’m fighting an enemy and all I can see is the back of him, because the camera is behind him and I can’t even see my character at all. Plus, in the third phase of the final battle (I don’t know if it’s the last, yet), the game crashed. I didn’t like how they handle this particular phase very much to start with, but then the game crashed. And there were no savepoints in the middle. I would’ve been happy to hit one and stop for the night 2 hours ago, but there were none to be had. Suddenly you get sprung with a new type of weapon, and it doesn’t work like the other ones did, and besides, you can’t see yourself anyways to see if you’re doing it all right.

So I haven’t yet beaten the game, and I’m assuming it’s just a matter of time before I do. I think I got it…last week? 2 weeks ago? I’m not sure. But, considering that the part where the game crashed is called ‘Final Battle’, I think I can give a somewhat thorough review. I would still, despite the various late-game nasty flaws, say the game is Good. I have enjoyed it and it’s confounded me (in good ways) and pissed me off (in bad ways). And it would only bother me as much as it does if the game is, in the end, good. And it is.

Shitness of Windows

Every time I try to do anything interesting or nontrivial with Windows, I get let down. I feel like it has to be due to my personal ignorance of the environment. But my problem is, the more I learn about it, the less I feel like it’s ignorance and the more I feel like it’s actual, practical experience that tells me so.

For example, I have a busted windows box with a dying HD. I install ‘Doze on the “D” drive – the second IDE disk. I use this copy of windows to try to copy off the data from the C drive. It takes a long time – the disk is trying over and over and clicking and warming up and all kinds of terribleness – but eventually I get some data off it. So great. I try to do some actual work on this new install of windows and I feel like it keeps trying to look at the C drive, so I figure I’ll unmount it. Can’t. It’s a “boot” drive, even though the D drive is my ‘system’ drive. Well, fine, so I pull my dying C drive (I figure I got what I could off of it anyway). System won’t boot. Oh well, I guess I need a bootsector rewrite or something. Fine. Windows CD, recovery console, fix it…and it can’t find my windows. I might as well not have it installed. Never mind the fact that every single file that Windows should rightfully need is right there. But Recovery console can’t find anything. So I have to reinstall windows. And if I try to reinstall it right back to where it was before, it threatens to toss my files (including my recovered server volume). So I have to put it somewhere else.

Mind you, on a Linux box or a Mac, I could do this in 2 seconds. In linux, you re-lilo (showing my age there) or re-grub the disk, and that gets you a new bootable volume (BIOS permitting, HD sizes, etc, etc). On the Mac…I don’t even think you have to do that because the firmware is a bit smarter about locating disks and booting off of them. You can either use the Startup disk control panel from a CD or even hold Option during boot and it will let you pick which volume to boot from. Easy.

So now as I’m running through the Windows install I thought I would document the reboots. My policy is I install everything on the ‘express’ list.

  • When it switches from textmode to graphics mode. (OK, this one barely counts, but it is, strictly speaking, a reboot. I saw BIOS. It rebooted.)
  • When graphics mode completes, system installed.
  • New version of Windows Update requires reboot
  • Service Pack
  • 52 updates
  • IE 6
  • 9 more updates post IE 6
  • .NET 2.0 plus video driver
  • Whoops! two security updates for .NET 2.0 – edit – this did NOT require a reboot!

That’s fucking shit. What should take minutes takes hours.

Star Wars Episode III – Revenge of the Sith

I just saw Star Wars Episode III again. I had some thoughts:

The Chosen One: Is Anakin the fabled Chosen One who will bring balance to the force? Yes – but notice the prophecy is not about ‘ridding us of the dark side’ or anything like that – the phrase is ‘balance’. And the Jedi, led by Master Yoda are arrogant, and do have too much power. Perhaps the Balance he brings to the force is both reducing the power of the ‘light’ and dark sides of the force.

Yoda: This useless fuck deserves to die. His battle with the emperor – he runs from him! Runs! What kind of Jedi is that?! Anakin comes to him with prophecies of death and is freaked out – Yoda’s counsel is to “be detached…?” Come on! You could’ve been helpful there. But you blew it with platitudes. Emperor Palpatine’s barb he throws at Yoda – calling him arrogant – is accurate.

I’m assuming Darth Plagueis was Palpatine’s master.

And finally – Anakin’s dreams about Padme – were they placed by Palpatine? Or was Padme’s death simply completely inevitable? Or was it a self-fulfilling prophecy? I don’t know.

Total Annihilation Glossary

Total Annihilation is a great RTS (Real-Time Strategy) game. I have been playing it every Thursday for several years now, with the same set of friends. There are too many things to say about it, so I am just going to put everything in a glossary.

Air Limits – All TA games had gotten to a point where the objective was just to hold off your opponents for long enough to build an insane economy, then attack the enemy with near-infinite and rapidly replenishable air units (usually advanced fighters) – until the enemy “aired out” (killed via air). We got tired of this same thing happening over and over, and began to institute limits on the number of air units that can be constructed (air limits).
Arm – one of the two ‘factions’ in TA. Arm units feature the fast, cheap, destructive, and durable Flash tank as their low-level vehicle unit, and the Maverick as an example of a high-end robot (“K-Bot”) unit.
Big Bertha – A large, extremely expensive, slow-firing long-range gun. Requires lots of energy to fire. Usually used offensively – place into position so that it looks over an enemy base, and with enough Energy and careful management, destruction will ensue.
Bombers – (Basic and Advanced) – expensive and destructive air unit. If you don’t have good enough air defenses, a group of bombers will be able to destroy anything of yours – a common favorite is a Commander.
Breach (breachers, breaching) – A ‘hole’ in enemy defenses. Most often, you will have to punch a hole in the enemy defenses using ‘breaching’ units (breachers) to destroy enemy defenses and open up holes in dragon’s teeth defensive lines. See “Crunchy Outside” vs. Defense-in-depth.
C&C (other resource theory) – “Command and Control.” TA has two resources – metal and energy. We semi-jokingly also refer to ‘the other resources’, one of which is “C&C”. As the game progresses, one cannot individually manage units one-by-one any longer – there are too many and too much is going on all at the same time. Some interesting ideas – like using Air Transports to manually move small, destructive units behind enemy lines – become unusable in practice because of the high “C&C” cost inherent (you must manage each unit, one by one, into the transport, and then manage them off the transport as well. Doing so without going insane is very difficult. Without losing half or more of your units on the transport is very unlikely). Good base defenses are less flexible than simply building units, but good base defenses manage themselves – thus ‘generating’ C&C.
Commander – A unit that can build, generates metal and energy, provides storage for both, and can be extremely destructive in combat. Has the “D-Gun” which will destroy any unit it hits, cutting a swath of destruction. The D-Gun is very expensive to fire, however, and its range is relatively short. The commander dies in a massive explosion, which can often destroy most of the enemy units killing him. Still, it’s often very wise to target an enemy commander. Early on, this can be devestating. Later on during the game, the commander’s share of your economy and offensive/defensive power declines, and his loss is more bearable. Usually will cause a Morale hit on your enemy though.
Core – One of the two ‘factions’ in TA. As a low level vehicle, uses the Slasher, a dangerously long-range and relatively maneouverable rocket unit. As a high-end vehicle, can use the Goliath Very Heavy tank. An advanced K-Bot unit they use is the Morty. They have a specific anti-Flash defensive gun called the Immolator.
Crunchy Outside – A defensive base system whereby you ring your base with a dragon’s-tooth wall, and put guns right behind it. However, on the inside of your base, you may have few defenses. This means that once the outside of your base is ‘breached’, enemies can pour in and destroy everything in your base. That being said, it also means your defensive guns are pointed at the enemy, and in a position to shoot at them. No guns are ‘wasted’ on the inside of the base.
Defenders – Arm defensive rocket unit. Vital for anti-air defense, and extremely useful for ground defense as well. Not a lot of ‘punch’, but great range. The ‘Core’ version of this is not called a Defender but we still call them Defenders anyways.
Defense-in-Depth – A defensive strategy which may mean there is a ring of outer defenses, but also, inside those are even more defenses. The disadvantage is that some guns you build (the inner ones) will not ever have a chance to fire on the enemy if all goes well. The advantage is that if all _doesn’t_ go well, if the enemy breaches your defenses, your inner guns will start firing on them.
Dragon’s Teeth – a defensive emplacement that is basically a ‘rock’. It can absorb a ton of enemy fire before it is obliterated. Placing guns behind dragon’s teeth causes multiplicative increases in their defensive power.
Energy – One of the two resources in TA. Energy is considered ‘cheaper’ – because energy deficiencies can be remedied by building more energy generation equipment (Solar panels, wind generators, etc).
Fighters – Anti-air units. When in the hands of someone sufficiently skilled enough, they can knock out just about any one unit by ‘swooping’ the fighters close enough just to fire one shot, then pulling the fighters right back out again. Modern bases dictate large amounts of air defense, all throughout, to avoid just this eventuality.
Flakker – advanced anti-air gun. Can decimate large numbers of fighters in a few shots. Takes a beating. Expensive. Not ‘big’ enough range to defeat a sufficiently large bomber horde on its own, though.
Flash – cheap, rugged, powerful, fast, maneuverable Arm vehicle unit. Often used very early-game for a ‘flash rush’ – sending a large number of flashes to your enemy before he is ready. Can be devestating. Poor performance against fixed emplacements, dragon’s-toothed defensive guns. Fine against un-toothed stuff though.
Geneva – (Short for ‘Geneva Convention’) – Commanders (the one unit you start with in a game) explode HUGE when they finally die. A loss of ones commander in the middle of one’s base usually means that ones base defenses are ruined, as well as any production facilities or anything else. However, we realized very early on that if you walk your commander into someone else’s base, you can destroy just about everything they have with D-Gun shots, and even if your commander then dies, it will take out the entire opponent’s base. With preparation, your own base might even recover. This would become a very boring game – one team would just have their weakest player walk his commander into the opposing team’s strongest player’s base – knocking him possibly out of the game. The Geneva Convention states that we will not knowingly walk commanders into enemy bases. Commanders might wander towards someone else’s base – but then one will hear shouts of ‘Geneva! GENEVA!’ from the opposition – meaning “don’t go that way”. If commanders meet in the field, there’s nothing wrong with them D-Gunning each other into destruction, however.
Hammer – Arm artillery K-Bot. Very good anti-base unit. Durable. Not too pricey. Slow-moving, poor against other units. A smallish squad of hammers can knock out moderate base defenses relatively quickly, and for cheap, if no units are sent against them.
“HLT” (Sentinel) – Defensive laser gun emplacement – uses energy, but very effective base defense against ground units. Behind Dragon’s Teeth, they’re extremely destructive and very hard to take out. Kill counts of 20 or 30 enemy units are frequent with these, but numbers as high as 60 or even higher have been achieved.
Krogoth – Almost a joke unit, the Krogoth is built from a specialized factory that builds nothing other than Krogoths – the Krogoth Gantry. Inordinately expensive, but armed to the teeth and extremely well defended. They rarely make it into the game, and when they do, the winner has almost always already been determined.
Maverick – Arm Advanced K-Bot. Expensive, massively destructive unit. At last test, a Commander can be killed by 8 Maverick shots. The Maverick also fires very rapidly, around 2 shots per second or so. I (personally) believe the unit is actually unbalanced, due to how much damage it can dish out, versus its cost.
Merl – Arm Advanced vehicle. Can destroy base defenses from very far off. Nearly useless against other units. Expensive. When Merls roll up to your base – and they don’t have to roll up to it, they can stay nearly a screen away from it – destruction will start raining down on you unless you have units to counter them with. Some defenses, at least, of yours will be going down for sure.
Metal – the ‘more expensive’ of the two resources in TA, metal can only be gotten from metal extractors, which can only be built on metal spots – or from extremely inefficient “metal makers” which require massive amounts of energy to generate tiny amounts of metal. (There are also ‘metal boards’ which are pure metal, and will allow metal extractors to be placed anywhere). Metal also exists in debris left by destroyed units and defenses, and can be ‘reclaimed’ by construction units. Because of this, it’s very dangerous to send a large force into someone else’s base unless you ‘break in’ to the base. If your units are killed outside or very close to his base, your opponent will slurp up all the metal you’ve left and grow all the stronger.
Million-Slasher March A standard maneouver by ‘Beast’ and some of his proteges, it means grabbing a large collection of slashers and slowly, but surely, destroying the enemy, all the while growing stronger and stronger. The slashers almost never fully commit to any attack, but will knock down base defenses, guns, and opposing units. Meanwhile, Beast will be building more and more and more slashers and adding them to his army. Impossible to defend against in the long run, all you can usually do is hold out, while your opponents do other things to his production, base, teammates, etc.
Morale (other resource theory) – Morale of the real person who is playing TA is a real concern in TA. A user who’s “moraled out” can be near useless, even though he has sufficient troops and production. Certain attacks are designed to target enemy morale – having minimal actual impact on troops or production, but oriented towards making them angry or annoyed. Some players habitually “break” earlier than others, some not at all. Some players with poor morale can bring their entire team down.
Morty – Core advanced K-Bot – indirect fire (artillery) units. Slow moving, but can walk up steep slopes. A slow crawl of these units can be devestating to fixed defenses. Can even be damaging to units that walk into the area that damage is being rained down into.
Ramp – Production curve. Building up the ability to build more units and more production, faster. In TA, the player starts off with one unit, the Commander. Most often, the first several build orders will be for additional resource generation facilities. ‘Ramping’ means building more and more resource generation facilities (and factories) – and not necessarily building troops. Some very good players can ramp while also building and even using lots of units.
Rush – An early attack. Often done with Arm Flashes. Usually the player will deliberately order the construction of more units, earlier, and less production (thus damaging their mid-game ‘ramp’) in order to knock out or badly hobble or damage another player.
Splash – certain types of fire from certain units affect an area. One of the tricks seasoned players use is to fire a long-range weapon at a point on the ground at its farthest range, and allow the splash damage to affect something that is beyond the weapon’s real range. This is slow, but can be very effective.
Slasher – Core basic vehicle unit. Similar to the Arm “Samson”, the Slasher is a far superior balance of firepower, speed, range, and durability. Strictly speaking, the unit is designed for anti-air combat, but we have found that in large enough numbers, Slashers can take out units without being heavily injured, and can even ‘breach’ bases if left alone for long enough. The Samson, as a contrast, is rarely used in this vein, because it is less durable and has less punch.
Time (other resource theory) The other ‘invisible resource’ in TA is time. Two identical attacks at 20 minutes of elapsed game time versus 30 minutes can be a success or failure because of the difference of those 10 minutes. In that time the enemy may have been able to close off a gap in his defenses, shore up his production, or churn out a large number of units.
Unit-Limit – The default settings for a game of TA specify 250 units, maximum. There are special controls that can be used to raise that level, but we don’t play with them. Eventually, (definitely at the end-game portion), the player will run into the unit limit. At this point, the fastest regeneration of units, and the firepower of each unit become the controlling factor. Reaching unit limit almost always means that the player will attack, immediately – his production is being wasted, because he can generate no units.

Partisan Test!

Okay! Time to determine your political sophistication.

  1. What political affiliation are you? If you answer in a heartbeat, -10 points. If you prevaricate a little before answering, -5 points. If you say something other than “Democrat” or “Republican”, +0 points. If you answer “Conservative” or “Liberal”, you should probably give up this test – you’re going to lose.
  2. Have you ever voted for a member of the ‘opposite’ party?
  3. Who is the stupidest/worst/lamest/etc member of your party? Or name someone who you respect from the opposite party (need not necessarily vote for).
  4. Name something good said by a member of the opposite party.
  5. Any issue you don’t back your party with?
  6. Any issue where you agree with the ‘other’ party?
  7. What kind of thing, theoretically, would have to happen for you to leave your party?

If you had a hard time answering the questions because you don’t know which party is ‘your’ party and which is the ‘other’ party – you’re lying. Everyone leans. Or else you’re saying if you average up your votes for all things that it does end up right down the middle then you’re a weirdo.

If you easily answered the questions – answering #1 in a heartbeat and easily able to say that ‘no’ or ‘nothing’ is your answer for everything else, you are a douche. People like you make political discourse in the US into simple mudlsinging and label-attaching. When your party decends into some awful, terrible place from which all reasonable people will climb out, you will cling on. Congratulations. You are a Nazi. You kill women and children. You lose.

If you answered Yes to all the questions you are still lying. Stop it!

If you answered Yes to a couple of the questions, then good. You are interesting.

Thank you!

Camino crash

Post started originally 2/3/07 – Okay, today I actually managed to hang and crash camino.

Total web-browser lifespan – Hrm, looks like I was using it for a week as of 1/23, so figure I was using it since 1/16 – today’s the 3rd of Feb., so – 2 weeks and change, it looks like. Not bad. If I can postpone my next crash for another 2 weeks and change, I should be doing OK.

Camino’s crashiness seems to have been caused, for the most part, by my fondness for CamiTools – the lovely little Camino extension that lets you do lots of things – of which the only important thing is the ability to use FlashBlock. Apparently CamiTools does not work so good on Intel. So keep it under advisement. I think I might even be able to blame this one big crash on CamiTools.